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Some say he was born in Detroit, some say it was in Brighton. Others say he was raised by wild giant panda’s in the centre of Amsterdam. Which is hard to imagine since the last official panda-count in Amsterdam is zero.
Asino himself claims that he was born on a planet whose name is impossible to pronounce. He states he was sent here long ago by a guild of Annunaki that secretly run his homeworld to make the sickest beats known to man and all other habitants of the five main galaxies. This seems likely. But then again, Asino also says he is the son of a pornstar.
We don’t know much about the origins of this diamond in the rough. However, we do know some Native Americans have found images in ancient scriptures bearing a very close resemblance to Asino. And that some history experts claim to have found evidence that he was the right hand of Gaius Octavius during the Roman period.
Amongst friends, clubbers and colleagues Asino is known for his famous sayings, such as: ‘Hey there! You crazy house lovin’ panda bear” and “No, thank you”. He is also known for his techy and groovy beats that work infectiously on both humans and giant panda bears.
Although not many people know the current whereabouts of Asino, he is frequently spotted in the Dutch nightlife. This might have something to do with the aforementioned assignment Asino claims to have been sent here to do. If this is the case, he is well on his way to fulfill this job.
So, there you have it. All the information that can be found about Asino. To top it all off, some facts:
- Asino’s logo is the head and face of a rather cool looking panda bear.
- Asino means ‘donkey’ in Italian.
- Asino plays awesome House Music wherever he goes.
- Asino looks nothing like a panda or donkey.
- Asino was voted ‘most eligable bachelor’ by the Association of Single Housewives four years in a row.